Tension in the room

It was the last patient of the day. Why is it always the last patient of the day?

It was a well child exam of a beautiful toddler. She was in the room with both of her parents. She saw me enter and smiled. Mom gave her a photo to hand to me. It was a picture of her all dressed up looking so-oo big. I smiled and thanked her, giving her a hug.

In the room were mom and dad. When they looked at her or talked to her or to me about her, they beamed. Their eyes lit up as they proudly recited all the words she could say and the new things she was doing. They did not have any concerns. But...

When they looked at each other or exchanged a few words, the tension could be cut with a knife. I knew they were divorced. I knew they shared custody. They obviously loved their daughter. They showed their committment to her by both coming to the appointment -- or did they not trust each other to relay anything that may transpire at the doctor's to each other?

Divorce is such a sad part of our society. With more than half marriages ending in divorce, there are many children in shared custody. Most parents love their children even if they can no longer share a marriage with their child's parent. I hurt for the parents and the children in this situation. As a doctor who sees children, interacting with the adult parents is part of the equation. As a doctor to adults too, I feel the pain of both the parent and the child and want to help them both. But how?

I have seen this child since she was born. Her parents were married then and not now. I will continue to walk with her and with them doing what I can for all of them. One day, one visit, one situation at a time.