3.28.2006 12:48 am ...
I just came off call today. It was a long 36 hours stretch at the hospital that was busy with some highs and lows, tense moments and good moments. I came home by 3:30 pm. I was so tired, I think I went to sleep without eating anything. I was scheduled to go to a christian prayer group meeting at 7:00 pm
My eyes opened at 8:30 pm. For a moment I didn't know where or when I was. Then it hit me. I had missed the meeting I was looking forward to going to for a month. Drats! If you don't want to hear me whine, then don't read on...
I feel a sense of frustration. With the life in residency being what it is -- screwed up sleep routines, odd, disjointed times off, it is so difficult to have a life. I got up depressed and frustrated with myself that I have not been able to meet any of these meetings that I wanted to go to.
I called the hospital and found out that one of the kids we had admitted on call -- that we thought had Kawasaki -- has coronary artery anuerysms. It hurts to think of it. I wanted so much to talk to someone about my feelings. But, who? It is 10:30 pm at night. Who could I call at that odd hour?
Residency can be lonely. Because of the hours I do not have much of a social life. Since I do not drink, the bar scene doesn't work for me. I would love to join a class or group or something, but with my call schedule that keeps changing, I don't think I could make the classes. Who would put up with me anyway? They wouldn't see as much of me as they might wish and I might want to call or meet with them at odd hours of morning or night. My days off may come on a week day and I may work 3 weekends straight.
Okay. So I'm post-call and tired. Still...
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3 comments:
I know this post is old, but just in case someone else is feeling the same way you did and comes across this post. Yes, there a lot of sacrifices in the life of a resident! I know because I am currently dating one! We've been together for almost 3 years now and what you described in your post basically describes his life too! But I love him so much, and there's nothing we cannot work through. On top of residency being difficult, we've been in a LDR for the last year because I'm going to grad school in another state, but when you find the right person (friends or SO), they'll be with you through all the challenges and difficult moments of residency. It's definitely not easy to meet that right person but it is not impossible! For all those of you feeling lonely today, know that there are people out there who are ready to accept everything that comes with the life of a resident. People who are willing to be there for you, even when they know you won't always be able to "be there" for you (at least for the time being!). It just takes a special person! Good luck with the rest of your training :)
Solitude in residency is probably one of the most difficult experiences that I have had to endure. My two-year relationship ended early in my PGY2 partly due to conditions set by residency. Having a strong support system is key for residency, especially when you find yourself in the middle of nowhere.
Solitude in residency is probably one of the most difficult experiences that I have had to endure. My relation of two years ended early in my PGY2 year partly due to conditions set by residency. Having a strong support system in residency is key, especially when you find yourself in the middle of nowhere.
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